Personal & Professional Notes….
Cherilyn is married…again, after 7 years. She’s decided this guy is the one. 😉
New cards arrived and are super cute!! (even without the beautiful P&C logo) #badbranding
Wants & Needs
by Cherilyn Hearn
Having just pulled off the cheapest wedding of all time and tackling the subject of registering, I’ve been giving a lot of thought to wants and needs and how simple life really can be. I have always somewhat believed in this philosophy, because I wanted to be a stay-at-home mom. So I don’t have credit cards, a fancy car, a Starbucks addiction, etc. Don’t get me wrong. I’m a girl and I shop, but I am creative about saving money and making money.
So we decided to get married.
I’m so glad we had the conversation, or we may have never gotten married. Not because we aren’t in love or committed, but because in my dear husband’s mind, wedding means money, a lot of money. I should say meant. That’s what it meant in his mind, before we talked about it. There are so many things we are building together, things you don’t think about or even understand when you’re eighteen or twenty-five, things that cost money. Things that mean so much more than dresses and catering. Like so many things, our wedding became about needs and wants, even beginning with setting the date.
We originally planned for November…but I just knew, I would Pinterest and Hobby Lobby it to death and by November our ‘tiny’ wedding would be Charles & Diana all over again, with a hefty price tag…and for what? So I moved it up to a few weeks away!! My bouquet was homemade, $4…pearls from the thrift shop $5…things like that and it was wonderful. No bridesmaids, no caterers and the invite was on Facebook except for a few who don’t use Facebook and they got a 19 cent photograph invite with 44 cents of postage.
So somewhere along the way, someone asked if we were registered. I just felt like this was silly, frivolous, unnecessary. I mean, who says people getting married need gifts anyway? Registering is like “hey, don’t forget to get me a present!” So I wrote a sarcastic blurb on my Facebook on this issue and it spilled into so many other issues. I recommended people come bearing gifts, like laundry detergent and paper plates, Magic Erasers and printer cartridges! I then recommended that school fundraisers be fueled by selling paper towels and school supplies, things that people already need and already buy!! Who raises money selling overpriced cookies and magazines? They do…and we fall for it.
It seems like we can apply this to any part of our lives, large and small. What kind of house do we need, or want? What kind of car, clothes, jobs, vacations? Vacations?
That’s just it. If we avoid the little things, the frivolous, silly things, we can have vacations and retirement and Christmas. Those are just my ideas, but everyone has their own. You may be thinking that needs are boring, but wants are fun. The problem is, wanting is always temporary, shallow, fleeting. Need is deep. Need is oxygen and sunlight. You’ll find if you address only needs, you’ll end up with paid bills and electricity and peace of mind. But you just might also end up with a week in Rhode Island, a book tour and a bucket list. Needs can be big and extravagant too. The trick is really knowing how to tell one from another. 😉